Anxiety and intrusive thoughts

jiabe · September 29th, 2012, 22:31

Hi, I just started meditating with Lifeflow, and so far so good.
I'll write a little bit about my situation, if you care to read about it and how it is, because I've been living in hell for the last ten months.
I lost a lot of wight these days. When the depression started to lift a bit I had mad anxiety. I went out of the house every day, and I've never given in to the anxiety. But its a f*** nightmare. Just not mentally, but also physically.. Sometimes it felt like an elephant was sitting on my chest.

I woke up with 120 in pulse the next 4 months, and the thoughts and inner stress that cames with it did not help me. I litterally thought I was going crazy. My doctor told me I had GAD and that depression and GAD are often linked together. I refused to take anti-dep even though my doctor said what was happening to me was "unhumane". My family wanted me admitted, because my nerves was killing me..

In April, one day after taking magnesium and omega-3 for a few weeks, the trembling suddenly stopped. I still have some physical sensation, but mostly it isn't as bad. It still sits in my throat and on my left side.
I started using binaural entrainment in May, and I haven't looked back. I'm just starting on Lifeflow and I'm really excited about the new product. Even though life is still hard, I can read my notebook from the beginning of this year, and I've really improved.
Well, thats all for now. Thank you so much for reading (sorry for the long post). I'll keep you updated on the situation

pgkaakee · September 30th, 2012, 15:38

What is GAD?

jiabe · October 2nd, 2012, 15:41

Originally Posted by pgkaakee

What is GAD?

general anxiety disorder. Basically, you're anxious all the time and it doesn't have to be about anything spesific (like social anxiety etc).

pollyanna · October 2nd, 2012, 16:12

Originally Posted by jiabe

Hi, I just started meditating with Lifeflow, and so far so good.
I'll write a little bit about my situation, if you care to read about it and how it is, because I've been living in hell for the last ten months.

I was dating a guy for 6-7 months and it ended in December.
I'm a student now, but I used to work in the military. The last few years have been quite slow, activity wise (maybe too slow). When we broke up in December I hadn't slept for several days (I was working in between exams). I was also on this medicine (accutane, nothing to do with mental illness but the medicin can cause depressions), and the mini pill. Pluss, it was the darkest it gets during the whole year in Northern Europe. The perfect storm in other words. The 6.th of December I started trembling and my hands were shaking and everything was physically painful. And I just broke down that day. I changed from a happy person to.. this.. I had 10 days where I just were apathetic, but the mood got better at night. I lost a lot of wight these days. When the depression started to lift a bit I had mad anxiety. I went out of the house every day, and I've never given in to the anxiety. But its a f*** nightmare. Just not mentally, but also physically.. Sometimes it felt like an elephant was sitting on my chest.

I woke up with 120 in pulse the next 4 months, and the thoughts and inner stress that cames with it did not help me. I litterally thought I was going crazy. My doctor told me I had GAD and that depression and GAD are often linked together. I refused to take anti-dep even though my doctor said what was happening to me was "unhumane". My family wanted me admitted, because my nerves was killing me.. Two main problems was "Am I going crazy? Will I ever be myself again" and "I've been so low, how can I get pass this?". It's really horrible to be afraid of your own thoughts and company.

In April, one day after taking magnesium and omega-3 for a few weeks, the trembling suddenly stopped. I still have some physical sensation, but mostly it isn't as bad. It still sits in my throat and on my left side.
I started using binaural entrainment in May, and I haven't looked back. I'm just starting on Lifeflow and I'm really excited about the new product. Even though life is still hard, I can read my notebook from the beginning of this year, and I've really improved. My problem now is that I'm still kinda anxious, but the thoughts come and go more now, I'm more aware in what's going on in my head. I'm also doing kundalini yoga, which I find really usefull.

I'm in no doubt I will get through this, it's just a matter of time and keep on fighting. I've traveled the world, speak several different languages and been active and happy my whole life. It's the last few weeks I've felt that I have my head above water again. Still, a long way to go, but I've started the journey to get better now.

Well, thats all for now. Thank you so much for reading (sorry for the long post). I'll keep you updated on the situation

Hi Jiabe and welcome to the community

It's good to hear that your life is getting better for you and I look forward to hearing how you progress with meditating with LifeFlow.
The key is regular practice. Your post made me think of the phrase "Seek and you will find" The majority of people are deficient in magnesium and other minerals and it's good that you discovered this. You may find it useful to have a magnesium bath occasionally prior to meditating and/or spray a little magnesium oil on your skin daily. I can post you links for good sources if you are interested.

Meditating with LifeFlow has helped many people suffering with anxiety and panic attacks. Look forward to hearing how it helps you and wish you an abundance of peace and joy

jiabe · October 2nd, 2012, 21:53

Originally Posted by pollyanna

Hi Jiabe and welcome to the community

It's good to hear that your life is getting better for you and I look forward to hearing how you progress with meditating with LifeFlow.
The key is regular practice. Your post made me think of the phrase "Seek and you will find" The majority of people are deficient in magnesium and other minerals and it's good that you discovered this. You may find it useful to have a magnesium bath occasionally prior to meditating and/or spray a little magnesium oil on your skin daily. I can post you links for good sources if you are interested.

Meditating with LifeFlow has helped many people suffering with anxiety and panic attacks. Look forward to hearing how it helps you and wish you an abundance of peace and joy

Thanks Polyanna, for your kind words. I would really like to get some recommendations on magnesium oil. Yes, magnesium really helped me, and also the omega-3. The medicine I took, definitely made a chemical imbalance in my head. And, I'm kicking myself for it every day.

I think forgivness is a key momentum for me.. Btw, I had this experience the other day when I was meditating. I don't remember which fear/anxious feeling that came up from nowhere, up to the surface, but it was like someone put a needle to a balloon. And it exploded and disappeared, and I could feel the endorphins seeping through my body. Then another fear emerged, and the same happened again. It's the most intense experience I've had since I started meditating 5 months ago. And, yesterday I probably felt 10% better waking up.

I'm excited to see where this will lead me, and hope that I will start living my life again.
I appreaceate the support, and wish you all the best.

Jia