The Project Meditation Community Forum is temporarily in a Read-Only state due to maintenance and upgrades that are being applied. Although registration and the creation of new posts are currently not possible, you can still read and search the forum...

    If you are unable to find what you are looking for within the Project Meditation Community please check out our new Blog and/or our Facebook page.

    We will notify you as soon as our maintenance work is completed,

    Have a great day,

    Yours for HUGE success
    The Project Meditation Team

Releasing: feeling the feelings

Discussion in 'Mind, Body & Spirit' started by Kenobi, Dec 2, 2009.

  1. Kenobi

    Kenobi Member

    Hi, I read somewhere that when u releas u have to feel the feeling accuratly. First u have to find the center and edges of the feeling and only then u can releas. Is it really neccesery to feel the feeling so strogly, or is this just one way to releas? I tried this way couple days ago and managed to releas some feeligs and it felt it was pretty powerfull way, but I got stuck when I tried to releas one very strong feeling... So my gueston is is it relly important to identify with the feeling so precisely, because it felt so hard work. But on the other hand it relly worked.
  2. GilesC

    GilesC Member

    Hi Kenobi and welcome to the community.

    Not quite sure in what respect you are talking about releasign feelings. Do you mean as part of meditation; as part of LifeFlow, or just as part of self-healing practice?

    Essentially, if you don't feel your issues in some way then there is no issue there, but it isn't necessary to "accurately feel" or get deeply involved in the feelings to be able to release them. As long as the issue is specifically recognised then usually the healing techniques being used will work, whether that is EFT or other practices. Usually, the techniques will struggle to work if the issue at hand is not recognised specifically, but rather more generally. e.g. When someone comes to me and says that their issue is "depression", this is too general and can't be simply treated with a single focus on the depression, we actually have to work on the individual issues that make up the depression for that person, which could be a few or could be many as everyone's depression is different. Conversely, if someone comes to me with a phobia of spiders this is usually caused by one or two underlying issues and can be treated more quickly.

    If you find that focusing on your feelings really helps, then by all means go for it, but it's not standard practice in the healing techniques as often we aim to minimise distress for clients whilst still treating the underlying issues.


  3. Kenobi

    Kenobi Member

    Sorry I didnt make my self clear. I am using the Sedona Method.
    Last edited: Dec 3, 2009
  4. KeithP

    KeithP Member

    Hello Kenobi,

    I too use the Sedona Method and can understand your confusion as regards the releasing process.
    From my own experience I can only say that I have never felt the "feeling" as a physical presence in my body. I simply go through the releasing process and find that the "feeling, worry, anxiety" has gone or is at the very least greatly reduced.
    So far as I can see the main problem with the Sedona Method and Release Technique is that we think it is harder than it is. Simply release and move on, do not intellectualize about the process.
    Good luck and best wishes,
  5. Panthau

    Panthau Member

    Hi Kenobi,

    Im doing it this way: just watching my body, feel the energy flowing through it, and suddenly there comes something up (or not). Just watch it and allow it to be there, its part of your body anyway. When you´re feeling it, you can ask that feeling what it needs to get into your heart, for example attention, compassion or appreciation.

    The second thing would be, not to close yourself up in your daily routines when something (negative) comes up. For example, if you get into a conversation with someone, and feel unsecure when looking in his eyes, dont block that feeling. Theres maybe anxiety but underlaying theres a pain, for example that someone could not accept you the way you are. You can always ask yourself when you feel something, "what would it feel without that feeling" and most times you get directly to the source of that feeling.

    Feel it, but dont identify with it, because you are not the feeling!

    Hope this helps a bit,
  6. Kenobi

    Kenobi Member

    OK, thank u for helpful responses.:) I think I got back on the track now...
  7. Ta-tsu-wa

    Ta-tsu-wa Member

    In line with what Giles wrote, it could be helpful to look at the issues you're dealing with as though they were the parts of a tree. There are the leaves at the outermost edges of the branches, then the branches themselves, the trunk of the tree, and deep beneath them all, the roots.

    Many of the issues that trouble us could be likened to the leaves, which are just the outer tips. When we release these we feel relief, sometimes very poignantly. But we need to keep in mind that if we have only dealt with those outermost leaves, there are still deeper issues connected to those leaves that we have as yet not done anything about. And just as when plucking leaves off a real tree, if we do nothing more than that we can be assured in short order new leaves are likely to grow and take the place of those we removed. So our attempts at gaining relief could set up a sort of up and down pattern of relief, followed by the problems "growing back", followed by the need to get relief from them again, etc.

    No mistake about it, relief from the "leaves" feels good and there's nothing at all wrong with dealing with them in this way. But keep in mind, for lasting results a person should start looking to those deeper levels and work on resolving them. A leaf plucked from a tree will grow back fairly quickly. But if you remove the entire branch those leaves were attached to, it takes a great deal longer for a whole new branch to regrow itself. And if you cut the tree off at the base of its trunk, it takes a very long time to return. And if you go all the way down and dig out the roots the tree is gone once and for all.

    The nice thing about techniques like Sedona is that you can deal with the leaves and at the same time you can also start addressing the deeper levels as well. There is nothing that says you can't address multiple levels of an issue at the same time. This gives you the benefits of the quick, immediate relief, with the expectation that deeper and longer lasting relief is also taking place.

    My personal experience using these kinds of release methods is that I usually feel a more dramatic physical sensation of release when I'm dealing with the leaves than I do when I'm dealing with deeper levels like the roots. I might feel something doing that deep work, but initially at least, those feelings are much less pronounced that when dealing with more superficial levels on issues.

    One trick I picked up might be useful to you. Most release methods have you focus your attention on how and what you are feeling right at that moment. How does that issue make you feel emotionally and physically? Once you zero in on the feeling, they usually suggest you try to give that feeling some sort of a name, although some methods stress that naming the issue is not absolutely necessary. Personally, I like to name it while keeping in mind that whatever name I give a feeling is just a convenience I use in referring to that feeling, and is not in and of itself "the thing". It's like a map of the territory rather than the territory.

    So for example, let's say I'm feeling something uncomfortable, so I begin scanning my body and allowing myself to get in touch with all of the feelings surrounding this discomfort. Very quickly I give it a name, so I might say, "Right now I'm feeling anxiety."

    If I were to stop there and work on releasing these sensations I've designated as "anxiety", I would likely begin experiencing relief from the feelings, probably very pronounced relief, like the release you described. Then, if I want to take this a step further, I continue scanning through my body and I ask myself, "What feelings and sensations seem to exist even deeper, out of which these sensations of anxiety are emerging?"

    This isn't an intellectual question seeking an intellectual answer, but it is a search for the sensations of deeper feelings than those I've already designated as anxiety. You won't always be able to positively identify something below that level of anxiety, and that's perfectly fine. If you can't feel a sense of that deeper something then just continue to work on the anxiety at the "leaf level". Periodically check back to see if something deeper makes itself apparent. In time it probably will.

    So let's say I rescan my body and perhaps I notice there is a sensation that feels like maybe I'm not getting enough oxygen as I breathe. You know, a sort of mild sense of suffocation. So I focus my attention on that feeling and as I do I note that this mild feeling of oxygen deprivation appears to be something outside of my ability to control or influence. So I think to myself, "Ah, yes, I'm feeling like something is out of control here." And so I decide to name this feeling, "lack of control." Then, rather than working to release anxiety, instead I work towards releasing the sense that I'm not in complete control of something, or to release my desire to be in control of something that I currently do not feel in control of.

    Now, keep in mind, my immediate sense of lacking control has to do with my breathing. But that does not mean that my root issue is that I don't feel I am able to control my breathing. The breath is just the metaphoric way the problem of needing to control something, or of not being in control of something is being expressed. What is important is not the breath, but rather it is what the breath represents. Again, perhaps I can positively identify what this is, and then again maybe I cannot. It's not all that important. What is important is that I've identified an issue deeper than anxiety as being related to feelings of not being in control, regardless of what the object of that control feeling is. Just knowing it's a control issue is enough.

    So then I begin working on releasing my need to control, or releasing the feeling that I'm somehow not in control. This is a much deeper issue than the anxiety. It is what is causing or at least contributing to the anxiety. If I can address the control issue I will find a more lasting relief from the anxiety issue.

    I may not feel the release of the control issue as strongly as I do of the anxiety because it is a deeper issue. You might feel it more strongly than I do. We're all different, and releasing is somewhat of a unique experience to each of us.

    I know some courses in releasing, and I believe Sedona is one of them, gives you a whole list of deeper, associated issues that a leaf-level issue is related to. It will say, for instance, that if my immediate feeling is jealousy, then the related deeper issue is probably connected to love. I think lists like this can be helpful, especially if we're new to using techniques of releasing, but I also think we need to keep in mind that checking our own individual experiences is the best bottom line. We shouldn't just accept that if I feel X, then the chart in a book says my deeper issue is Y or Z. Maybe it is, and maybe it isn't. It's a nice place to begin, but always rely on what your own feelings direct you to, and when the theoretical chart of associations says something different than what your own feelings tell you, ignore the chart and follow your feelings. They will be more accurate for you in that instance.

    Hope this throws a bit more light on the process for you as I've experienced it in my own life.
  8. Kenobi

    Kenobi Member

    "So then I begin working on releasing my need to control, or releasing the feeling that I'm somehow not in control. This is a much deeper issue than the anxiety. It is what is causing or at least contributing to the anxiety. If I can address the control issue I will find a more lasting relief from the anxiety issue."

    So thats what Lester means when he says releas the want behind the feelings (control, approval and security). I remember that Lester had said when you releas a want you drop thousonds of thoughts/feelings beneath it.
  9. Ta-tsu-wa

    Ta-tsu-wa Member

    I haven't read much of Lester Levenson's original writings, but what you paraphrase above from him sounds similar to what I've personally experienced. I suspect we're essentially talking about the same basic concept.

    Much of this goes back to the idea of learning to accept "what is" without reservations. That's not to say that you never try to improve or change something, but at least in the moment you're experiencing that thing you say to yourself, "Right now, right here, in this moment, this is what I'm experiencing, and I accept that this is my current experience."

    To me, that deep level of acceptance of "what is" is a form of releasing in its own right. If you are fully accepting of the moment, then by default you are already releasing any resistance to the moment. Again, that's not saying you won't try to improve it, but rather it is saying that you're not denying what exists in this moment, knowing that it is possible in another moment that the experience will change to something different.

    If I'm feeling afraid right now, then I accept that I'm feeling afraid. I don't try to pretend I don't feel that fear, and I don't stand there trying to convince myself that I shouldn't be feeling afraid. I'm just there, with my fear, and I acknowledge that fact. When I bring myself to that point an odd thing typically happens without my needing to try to make anything happen. My acceptance of the fact of my fear somehow makes the fear less intense. Of course it doesn't always work like that, but quite often it does.

    It seems to be like that even if there's a good reason to feel fear, say, I wake up in the middle of the night and I'm afraid because I think I just heard a prowler going through my things in the next room. In such an instance, fear is a useful mechanism for survival. It heightens my senses, prepares my body physically for fight or flight, and works to keep me safe. By accepting that I feel that fear it won't make the prowler suddenly disappear, but it will assist me in having a clear mind so that I can think and act expediently.

    But the main idea I was getting at earlier is that when you deal with deeper layers of feelings and experiences, below that "leaf level", I personally find the sensations associated with releasing are more subtle than when I'm addressing the more familiar surface level issues. That may just be me, but I've had others tell me their experience is similar. I suspect it's because we're just less familiar with the deeper levels of feeling and as such we don't recognize their presence as readily.
  10. Edwin

    Edwin Member

    The immediate effects are less, but with me I realise after a few days that the world seems a bit brighter after having dissolved the emotions at deeper levels.
  11. Kenobi

    Kenobi Member

    Yesterday I managed to release some deeper feelings. It doesnt feel so hard any more, I think I got over the resistance after meditating with lifeflow. Finnaly with more success.:D

    So now back to the goal that I have been trying to get since September.:rolleyes: I hope I get it faster by using this method.
  12. Panthau

    Panthau Member

    Goals goals goals... as long as you stay with wanting to get somewhere, youre going in circles.

    Good luck anyway :)
  13. Ta-tsu-wa

    Ta-tsu-wa Member

    Not necessarily, Pan. Goals are a necessary part of the practical side of living. Of course you can go overboard with them to the point that you're spending so much time living in the world of your future plans that you're not paying enough attention to the here and now. I suspect that's what your post was referring to.

    Brief forays into the future world of goals are required for life that doesn't want to get lost in pointless wandering. There's an old saying that goes something like this, "To the person who has no destination in mind, any place they end up is equally as acceptable as any other." I'm paraphrasing, but you probably get the idea.

    Of course there are many places you absolutely would not want to end up. You wouldn't want to become a drug addict or an alcoholic for instance. You wouldn't want to end up as a child abuser. You probably don't want to end up alone and lonely or riddled with health problems. Having goals for what you do want is a part of insuring you don't end up in those situations you really don't want to be in.

    We have goals all the time, even if we're not thinking about them as goals. You saw a post on here and decided to post a response of your own. You had an outcome in mind that prompted you to share your opinion. Arriving at that outcome you had in mind was a goal. A very short term goal to be sure, but a goal nonetheless. If you truly had NO goals you wouldn't have bothered offering your opinion. If you decide you need to pop down to the corner market very quickly to pick up a quart of milk for a cake you're baking, that trip to the market is a goal. Obtaining a quart of milk at that market once you get there is another goal. In fact baking the cake that requires the milk is also a goal. Everything we do in the phenomenal world is the result of some kind of goal.

    Buddhists are often criticized by non-Buddhists for allegedly promoting the idea that you should be entirely without desires of any kind. That idea of being "desireless" is another way of describing non-attachment. It doesn't mean, as many non-Buddhists like to characterize it, that you have absolutely no desires at all. It simply means you do not identify with desires to the point that you confuse them with being a part of yourself. It's a distinction many non-Buddhists find difficult to grasp.

    Goals are useful and necessary. But once you establish them you don't spend all your time living in and imagining them. You come back and you live for the present, occasionally returning to check on your progress towards the goal, make any course corrections necessary, then back to the present. Plan for the future but live in the present. That's the way to properly use goals.
  14. Panthau

    Panthau Member

    You can also express it this way... goals are useful for the self, but wasted time for the I.

    You know, im a lazy guy... i want to express things as short as possible *gg*
  15. Matti

    Matti Member

    Yeah, but sedona method intention is to release the wants. So if you keep releasing eventually you have no wants and you can see the self more and more.

    Benhilton you should perhaps ask that in meditation section.

Share This Page