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Leaving Friends Behind

Discussion in 'Mind, Body & Spirit' started by MetaCognition, Mar 22, 2011.

  1. MetaCognition

    MetaCognition Member

    Feb 12, 2011
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    Does anyone else here have experience with the fading away of once close friends who do not show genuine interest in undergoing the transformation to inner peace with you?

    One of my friends, who I have been extremely close with for nearly 7 years, is trapped in negativity. He's a pretty self-aware being, way more than average, but is in love with his thoughts even though they cause him great pain. He consciously identifies with his thoughts because he feels that his "crazy" thoughts are what makes him who he is. Having at one point been just like him, we connected for many years and underwent many adventures together that I will never forget.

    Now, however, it's become glaringly obvious why so many others stayed away from him all these years. He's extremely selfish and self-interested, everything always comes back to him and what he thinks about whatever topic is being discussed. He rarely has good things to say about anyone unless he deems they are "on his level" intellectually, which of course, is only a select few.

    My question is, what do I do? Part of me wants to keep pushing him to join me on the process of undoing the self-image and recreating a life of joy and pleasure, but every time I speak to him, I can see old patterns of negativity and doubt fill my thought space. We live about 45 minutes apart right now (at different colleges), so we CAN easily meet up, but like I said, I don't have much interest in doing so, though I want him to realize his true potential and overcome his unneccesary depression.

    Any thoughts on dealing with figures from the past?
  2. Edwin

    Edwin Member

    Dec 15, 2007
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    The thing you are describing is called "depression" and even tho the person caught in it is convinced that he or she is experiencing it exactly the other way around, depression is the ultimate selfishness.

    To allow your thought-stream to be caught in a negative spiral that can affect your life and that of those around you, is an act of agression towards the creative power of life.
    But, this is not deliberate, as a certain amount of "waking up" is needed before this negative thought spiral is seen through.

    Whatever you focus your energy on, you bring about.

    Unfortunately, there are no ways to wake a person up until he or she is ready for it. Sit in the sideline, observe the game from the dug-out, and only enter the field when it is time for you to enter it, when the Big Coach asks you to.
    Until then, chew your chew, spit every once in a while, and stand by your friend from the dug-out. In time, the thought pattern, the ego of your friend will show itself as the fraud it is.

    Then, you can help him or her to drop the less desirable parts of their ego, and settle with their true self.

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