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Confused with Mr. Tolle

Discussion in 'Mind, Body & Spirit' started by stefanabovetheview, Feb 14, 2011.

  1. Im 3/4 through the book ''The Power of Now''. I really like it a lot, even tho it can be a little confusing.:) It gave me a sense of clarity and I had one of the deepest meditating sessions after reading about the present moment and etc.
    But it also gave me a sense of confusion and disagreeness, together with clarity and agreeness.
    Im so confused I cant make it 100% clear what im confused about:p.

    He teaches that one doesnt need anything to be happy, but the mind thinks that after getting something or losing something, he/she will be happy, when infact, it wont, its just temporary joy, because the present moment is all there is, and thats where happiness is.
    -I partially agree with this. Yes, the past and future are illusiory, the present moment is the only thing that will ever be, but what about focusing on your past to learn from your mistakes and improve? What about planning the future? I WANT to become succesful in what I want to do. For example, in the future I want to start a business, I want to improve in the sports I do, and all those needs. Isnt that normal? When one is in the NOW and everything is perfect, what success will that bring him/her in the future? Where has all the desires to become a great football player, business man, martial artist, skater or whatever, gone?
    I personally think one should use the present moment (and always be present) to make improvements for the present moment coming up in the future.

    Im not sure what he mentioned about purpose, but from what i remember (i might be wrong) is that he denies Robin Sharma's saying-''A purpose of life is a life with purpose''. Yes, a person who trully has the desire to be an artist, should strive towards perfection in art. I think Tolle mentions when you be, thats your purpose.

    Here are my view on life, currently:
    One should always be present, but also recall the past without judging it, to improve the mistakes hes made and learn lessons from it. One should look into the future to find out whats best for him, and strive towards perfection.
    Being in the moment and being happy throughout life time will not make you successful. One should be in the moment and be happy, and use this to lead him or her towards what he or she wants to be.
    Letting go of all needs will make you happy because you have nothing to look forward to, and you have nothing to lose. And I dont find that quite satisfying.

    As you see, im very confused that I couldnt even write down what im confused about properly. I hope you guys get what i mean haha. If you do, please reply to this and make it clear to me. Also, mention if ive mistaken Tolles teachings.:)
  2. pollyanna

    pollyanna Super Moderator

    Hi there Stefan, first of all, I believe knowing your purpose gives you a tremendous driving force. I fully intend to fulfil my purpose while I am in this physical form and meditating with LF, using Creative Flow/Optimal Learning etc. are great tools to help me achieve this. They also have helped me to enjoy the present moment, whether I am working or enjoying time with my family and friends.

    When I used to be working (before LifeFlow) I often was worrying about family members etc. and when I was taking time out with my family, I was often thinking what I needed to be doing with my work :eek:

    Meditation has brought me balance and focus and wherever I am now, I am actually there. This is what the NOW means to me :) Always being present with whatever I am doing.

    When things happen, as they do to us all, I quickly accept or change what I can, avoiding so much unneccesary drama and believe me, it wasn't always like this.

    Eckhart Tolle must have had plans and goals to write his books and do seminars etc. but I am sure he enjoys the journey along the way.

    Some people meditate to find a deeper spiritual connection, some want to get rid of supressed emotions - there are so many different reasons people have. I actually thought meditation was the missing link to achieving my goals faster and it is a tremendous help indeed - I have had quite a number of great insights/aha moments in both personal and business life which have proven to be priceless. Yet I have realised so much more :) I had no idea just how much difference it would make to my life and that of my families.

    Below you will find links to a few old posts which maybe of use to you.





    I wish you an abundance of peace, joy and success :) :) :)
  3. Karmoh

    Karmoh Member

    Hi stefanabovetheview,

    Great advice from Pollyanna, heed her words :)

    Ah! One of the most confusing things about being in the NOW is the belief that you have to give up something to be there. The secret is, is that we are already there, but we strive to be in the future or dream of past exploits.
    Mr Tolle’s words are pointers to a brighter cleaner space within which you exist. While studying, study, don’t dream of Football, while playing Football, play Football, don’t dream of the girl (or boy) next door. When doing chores, give them you full attention don’t criticize the reason why you have to do them, be in the moment, whether good or bad.

    Try not to confuse yourself with this. If you are in the present, you cannot be thinking of the past or future. If you want to be successful in some field then that takes effort and courage of conviction, but you have to be there. If say you want to be a doctor this may take 7 years of study, so you study, the map is already there for you.

    Success comes in many forms but the measure of that success comes from within not peer review.

    When you have space for the present moment, it opens up an amazing world of possibilities. You will make mistakes, but you learn and move on, you will have fun, but you don’t dwell on or crave a repeat of that fun moment.

    Here is the paradox again, you believe that if you let go you will have nothing to look forward to, but if you are present in the moment then there is no looking forward or grasping at the past. So you will be at peace with whatever you are doing.

    Hope that hasn't confused you more :)

    Peace :)
  4. Edwin

    Edwin Member

    Learning from the past is a system of the mind to stop us from making the same mistake twice.

    For instance, when I was a kid I had a next-door neighbour, a boy just about my age, who unfortunately was deprived of oxigen during birth, and this made him mentally challenged.
    He used to close the drawer with his fingers folded around the edge of the drawer, causing him pain over and over again.
    His damaged mind didn't tell him to stop doing that, the pain wasn't a warning to him, it was something that just happened to him every time he closed the drawer.

    These are the simple examples, but that is what the system was made for.
    Simple things.

    Now, if you have gone through a painful divorce,worrying about being hurt in the future based on the past and because of that you are afraid to go into a serious relationship...
    Then you know that both your past, and your reflection of what the future might become, are not helpful. You might be missing out on a lot of fun right now !

    The past is nothing more than a rather faulty system of recollections in your brain.
    Faulty ?

    Yes ! Can you remember what you were doing around this time a year ago ?

    We seem to rely greatly on this memory, but a lot of the time this memory is not complete.
    So, let's rely on our ability to stop ourselves from making the same mistake twice, and forget about the past all together.

    Now about the future.

    The ability to set a goal like you said, is not bad. A goal gives you direction, purpose, a passion even.

    Living your life passionate, is living in the Now.

    Worrying about the future is doing the exact opposite.
    This drains your energy, making you struggle through life in the Now, which makes it even harder to change your direction. Believe me, I know...
    If there is a chance that something bad will happen, there is nothing wrong with taking steps to avoid that, but worrying about that doesn't help.
    You take the steps you can, and that is all you can do.
    If that doesn't divert the threat, you have to accept it.

    The only time that really exists, that is not illusory like the past and the future, is the Now.
    You can only act, or choose not to act Now.

    Think of the Now not like a point that is racing along a timeline from past to future, instead, think of the Now as that in which everything appears and disappears.
    Even tho it feels as if we are racing through time, time is actually racing through us instead.
    All there is, all that is real, is Now.
    What we think are past and future can only appear in our minds in the Now anyway ! It's all there is, really !

    So, set a goal for the future, fine, but work towards that goal Now !
    Give the moment that you are in total attention, focus on the task at hand, and nothing more.
    As soon as the task is done, focus on your next task.
    This is a meditative state of living, and it will improve the work you get done hugely.

    Your life will have more quality from it !
  5. GilesC

    GilesC Member

    Beaten to it.... what they said. :)

    Living in the Now does not mean forgetting the past or not learning from the past, it simply means putting the focus on the present moment, and acting on what is in front of you Now. If that requires skills/knowledge that you have gained from the past, they will come to the present moment and be used, but if you focus the mind on the past (or even the future), you will be distracted from what is there in front of your Now and your action will not be what is truly needed in the Now.


  6. WOW, is all i have to say. But ill say more.

    I got the chills after reading each one of your replies! thats WOW. Now I have no idea what i was so confused about, it all seems clear. I guess I have mistaken what it means to be in the present moment, and at the same time I feared a change. I was scared that life wasnt what i thought it was. I was scared that if i'm in the moment, the dissapearance of the past and future might damage me in some way. I was also actually scared that if I truly am in the NOW and eventually become enlightened, i will be a vegetable, sit and do nothing. I just laughed at that now haha:p. Well its all much more clear to me now, especially reading this after a meditating session when im mostly relaxed.
    Polly, time to do some reading on those links. Everything comes to use in a way.
    And Edwin, no i havent gone through a painful divorce, i'm only 17, so that would be a little wierd.:p
    Thanks to each one of you wise ladies and gentlemen!!!
  7. pollyanna

    pollyanna Super Moderator

    That's a wonderful realisation for you Stefan :) and I can understand where your fears came from - the word meditation brings all kinds of ideas until we realise how natural it is. I am so happy for you and wish you much peace and joy :) :) :)
  8. Edwin

    Edwin Member

    Of course that was just an example :D

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