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Charlie Brown and his Meditation Journey – thanks for joining!

Discussion in 'Meditation Chatter Box' started by CharlieBrown, Aug 20, 2009.

  1. GilesC

    GilesC Member

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    I'm just missing the pink glasses. ;)
     
  2. CharlieBrown

    CharlieBrown Member

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    Guys, I thought you were both pulling my leg, but then I did a bit of research on the web and I have actually seen that such a thing as the "third eye" concept really exists...

    Actually, this sounds indeed better than brain cancer (I was just joking there), but I am now still very worried. By doing some more research on the web, I have come across this page (Closed-eye hallucination - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia), and what I have been experiencing seems *exactly* what they define as "Level 2 Hallucination: Light / Dark flashes":

    Now, considering I am not on drugs, I don't smoke, I don't drink alcohol (for that matter, I don't even drink sparkling water!), I should not be experiencing anything like this, so this is just scary.

    Not sure what I should do: if I go and see a doctor, he will for sure tell me to stop doing what I'm doing when these phenomena occurs, i.e. meditation...

    Any suggestion?

    Seeing things that do no exist (like bright light in a dark room) scares the hell out of me, to be honest... :(
     
  3. Franz

    Franz Member

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    Well I might be totally off but when I started LifeFlow 10 all the way down to 7 alot of unwanted feelings surfaced...fear being one of them. I started feeling fear and at the time I was trying to overcome anxiety, panic attacks, etc...The fear I would feel would attach itself to anything. Then I realized my thoughts and emotion were all false. I was even afraid to meditate because I thought I would go crazy or something. I didn't even want to google stuff on meditation because I was afraid I might find something that scared the heck out of me that I was experiencing. I felt my muscles tense up in my chest and that scared me. It was weird. Unwanted thoughts and emotions are brought to the surface to be released. First you're AFRAID you have brain cancer due to you being AFRAID of what you're seeing. Fear will attach itself to something and consume you. I bet this has been on your mind constantly. Your mind is trying so hard to figure out a way to get rid of it because your FEAR there might be something wrong. See the pattern?

    Sounds very similiar to what I felt. Then I noticed something. Was my problem the meditation that might cause me to go crazy, or the tense muscles in my chest that lead me to believe something was wrong, or the fear i would discover something that lead me to believe meditation was harming me...or was the real issue fear itself. Fear is the root of alot of other negative emotion. You are absolutely fine. The fear is just coming to the surface and trying to attach itself to something. Observe how this works. Then you release the fear when you figure out its far from the truth. Consider it your first and one of the most important lessons. Fear for the most part is false. What if it's this or what if it's that? The truth is you see a light when you close your eyes. That's it. Pay attention to the thought, watch how it starts in your mind then causes the feeling of fear within you. Do you see how ridiculous and false fear is? I mean brain cancer?

    Sounds so familiar to what I felt. Mine was even more ridiculous that I am almost embarrased to share but I will. I thought meditating would give me some condition that would cause me to hallucinate and see ghosts and it would freak me out. Silly right???

    YOU ARE FINE. Laugh at it and continue. Hope this helps and please if by some chance I meet any of you in person, don't make fun of me about the ghost thing. :)
     
    Last edited: Sep 17, 2009
  4. CharlieBrown

    CharlieBrown Member

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    Thanks for taking the time to share your view, Franz!

    Just to clarify: I am *not* feeling anything bad, and the thing about brain cancer was just a (stupid) joke, I was not really afraid of that, or of anything in particular. I am just scared of "seeing things that are not there" - and to me, seeing a light in a dark room, falls under that category...

    One thing is to say to just let go if you have negative feelings popping up, without attaching to them (I can buy into it, even if of course I understand why this may be difficult to do), but another thing is having your mind visualizing things that do not exist as if they were true, and just "ignore it"... :confused:
     
    Last edited: Sep 18, 2009
  5. Itlandm

    Itlandm Member

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    I think I can see your point, CB. After all, I pared down meditation to little more than a small hobby for many years after I began experiencing increasingly frequent outbreaks of telepathy and ESP in my ordinary life. I wanted to live in a normal, scientific world. I don't really regret this, because that was who I was (and to a large degree still am).

    I have to say that one flash of light is a pretty tiny reason to back out, though. I have seen worse than that just by staying up too late. You sure there isn't something else that makes you uncomfortable?
     
  6. Franz

    Franz Member

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    I see. Ok I think I totally went in a different direction there. LOL! Anyhow I say keep up with the meditation CB. It may be that certain parts of your mind or consciousness being moved for the first time or it may be nothing. I say you keep going to find out.
     
  7. CharlieBrown

    CharlieBrown Member

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    Guys, thanks both for your comments, which are really helping me in putting things into perspective.

    I am so glad that I started posting here, because only people with more experience than me can tell me when I should get worried and when I shouldn't bother, because you went through the same thing.

    I am not at all planning to give up, may be I will just do some experiments, for example I can try meditate with and without LF, to see if that changes something (for now, both times I had these flashes I was using LF, don't know if there is any correlation or not).

    >You sure there isn't something else that makes you uncomfortable?

    To be honest, yes, but it is so childish and stupid that I would avoid saying it...
     
  8. Bhavya

    Bhavya Member

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    Hi CB
    What makes you think that the light you saw doesn't exist? :)

    When the third eye opens, we're able to "see" energy that normal viewing doesn't pick up. There are all sorts of phenomena that our 5 senses are too slow to receive. You may even discover at some point that you start to see auras or have other visions. Itlandm spoke of telepathy and ESP. Many meditators find that these increase with regular meditation, myself included. I find it's best to view all that as interesting but inessential for our journey towards peace and compassion. But they aren't signs of insanity or illness. In fact we can say they're a signpost that we are opening to a higher frequency.
    Just don't get too caught up in them, as Michael suggests.

    I like to begin my meditations with a prayer or invocation and visualize myself wrapped in white light which protects and heals me. This puts me in alignment with my Higher Power so I can truly relax and feel safe. :)

    I hope that helps
    Love and blessings
    Bhavya
     
  9. CharlieBrown

    CharlieBrown Member

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    Thanks for your post! I am actually doing the same thing, following the meditation program I have subscribed to - basically I open up with a prayer and I close with giving thanks and envisioning myself "giving" to the world the positive feelings I have been experiencing while meditating. I was feeling very silly in the beginning doing this, but after just a few weeks, it is now much more normal and natural!
     
  10. Bhavya

    Bhavya Member

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    I end that way too. There are lots of spiritual traditions that include sharing the positive vibrations we feel at the end of a meditation and I really think it helps others and ourselves too. We had some peace meditations last year at Project Meditation. Come to think of it, the International Day of Peace is this Monday, September 21! Edwin, where are you? Time to get cracking! :p
     
  11. CharlieBrown

    CharlieBrown Member

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    An extraordinary experience.

    Today I would like to share something with you which I am not even sure is related to meditation or LF effects, but I feel it is, and given you guys are teaching me to trust my feelings, I’ll say it is!

    I have always loved audio-books: it is almost 10 years, now, that I finish most of my days in bed, listening for 20/30 minutes to an audiobook, before switching everything off and slipping into sleep.

    The other day, I was listening to “Pillars of the Earth” (by Ken Follet, if I’m not mistaken), in my bed, with eyes closed and lights switched off as usual. The particular scene was about the wife of the main character giving birth in the woods – she will then die and the baby boy will be abandoned in the forest, because the father has no possibility to feed him and make him survive the cold night.

    Out of the sudden, something quite extraordinary (for me) happened: I was thrown right into the story. I am not saying I was “visualizing” it, or “watching” it as if on TV – it was 10 times, 100 times better, and more intense, than this. I was there, I could see, hear and sense everything, and I could move from place to place. I moved close to a tree, I touched and sensed its bark, the texture and roughness of it; I then watched a stone, got close to it, and admired its smooth surface, touched its frozen core, moved it and I have seen the humid imprint it left on the ground, on the rough terrain underneath it.

    I then got close to the woman who was giving birth, and I could see every detail of her face, of her body, the tears dropping off her eyes, I could sense her pain and frustration and anger… I then got shocked by what I was experiencing, and I “woke up”. I thought I just had a dream, a very lucid one, so I replayed the last 10/15 minutes of the recording, and I realized that what I “saw” was exactly what was described, “enhanced” with my “journey” (no reference, for example. to the description of the tree or of the stone).

    For what it’s worth, it has been an extraordinary (in the sense of out of the ordinary) experience for me, and I just wanted to share it with you all.
     
    Last edited: Sep 24, 2009
  12. Franz

    Franz Member

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    What an awesome experience CB! Also, I liked your response to what CB is seeing when he meditates Bhavya. I visit the forum 2-3 times per week and I have to say I enjoy how everyone's input and advice is so positive and so helpful. I remember when I first joined how much I needed help when people couldn't understand around me what was going on and I was too scared to share. This forum is awesome!
     

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