Losing Interest In "Success"

[MetaCognition]

The deeper I delve into erasing the constructs and conditioning of my own mind, and accepting my inherent self and true nature, the less I seem to care about the notion of "success." Obviously, we all know that this is just an idea. There is no such thing as success.

At the same time, we must interact in the world of symbols, yet I find myself having little interest in doing so. I am currently in my junior year of college, and have consistently gotten high grades throughout my college experience. Yet, this semester (the first time I have made daily meditation a part of my life and spent nearly all of my time devoted to BEING instead of THINKING) I find schoolwork to be nothing but an illusion. It is an illusion, of course, a fueling of the ego (I got an A), and therefore it seems to be holding me back.

While I truly enjoy going to classes in order to discuss consciousness with consciousness, the pathway of get good grades in order to get a job in order to survive is perhaps the clearest joke of all time. Yet, I cannot just "drop out" and do nothing. I feel like that is even more of a slap in the face to existence than participating in the illusion.

I have never felt happier in my entire life. Each time I have to "sit down and do work" that I know is just the mind speaking to the mind, the hilarious absurdity of the situation hits me like a ton of bricks. I am compelled to just laugh, but I do not want to limit my future living conditions (again an idea but one that will eventually become a reality).

To sum up, I am not worried. I am not anxious. I am in fact, quite detached from the entire process, and that is the "issue." How do members here balance their "work" life, SPECIFICALLY school if they are still in that setting. The cosmic joke of "learning" is one that I cannot stop laughing at.

[Karmoh]

Hi MetaCognition,

Sorry to be direct, but there seems to be contradictions in your statements. There are references to detachment, yet you crave a future where your living standards are not compromised. The ego is crafty and will use the flip side of duality to confuse you. Non duality is still a concept. If you think you are present then you’re not.

Originally Posted by MetaCognition

The deeper I delve into erasing the constructs and conditioning of my own mind, and accepting my inherent self and true nature, the less I seem to care about the notion of "success." Obviously, we all know that this is just an idea. There is no such thing as success.

You can only be successful if thoughts create that success, living in a tent on a self-sufficient commune deep in a Welsh valley could be seen as successful, as well as a top flight lawyer living in a multi-million dollar apartment in Manhattan.

At the same time, we must interact in the world of symbols, yet I find myself having little interest in doing so. I am currently in my junior year of college, and have consistently gotten high grades throughout my college experience. Yet, this semester (the first time I have made daily meditation a part of my life and spent nearly all of my time devoted to BEING instead of THINKING) I find schoolwork to be nothing but an illusion. It is an illusion, of course, a fueling of the ego (I got an A), and therefore it seems to be holding me back.

While I truly enjoy going to classes in order to discuss consciousness with consciousness, the pathway of get good grades in order to get a job in order to survive is perhaps the clearest joke of all time. Yet, I cannot just "drop out" and do nothing. I feel like that is even more of a slap in the face to existence than participating in the illusion.

I have never felt happier in my entire life. Each time I have to "sit down and do work" that I know is just the mind speaking to the mind, the hilarious absurdity of the situation hits me like a ton of bricks. I am compelled to just laugh, but I do not want to limit my future living conditions (again an idea but one that will eventually become a reality).

To sum up, I am not worried. I am not anxious. I am in fact, quite detached from the entire process, and that is the "issue." How do members here balance their "work" life, SPECIFICALLY school if they are still in that setting. The cosmic joke of "learning" is one that I cannot stop laughing at.

A feeling of detachment is just that, a feeling, a concept, try not to get caught in a trap of apathy

Balancing your daily life is easy, we wake, do stuff and then sleep. Doing stuff is how we survive.

Peace

[MetaCognition]

HAHA, thank you for your great response.

I was being slightly blinded by the idea of "anti-conceptual conception." I am slowly starting to see the deeper tricks that my thoughts pull out in order to attempt to be accepted as truth.

[Panthau]

It all leads back to the source of everything on this plane, which is to achieve positive feelings and avoid negative.

We´re all conditioned toward specific things, and we´re getting told that we will feel great if we do this or that, if we achieve this or that goal.

Through meditation, we can get aware of this conditionings, and let go... step by step. Getting back to that unconditioned, happy mind.

If we feel drawn to something, its always because we believe we can achieve positive oder avoid negativ feelings. Thats the motivation behind everything.

[Kauil]

"While I truly enjoy going to classes in order to discuss consciousness with consciousness, the pathway of get good grades in order to get a job in order to survive is perhaps the clearest joke of all time. Yet, I cannot just "drop out" and do nothing. I feel like that is even more of a slap in the face to existence than participating in the illusion."

You could always get into a creative career, or get a job that involves reducing human suffering. There is much physical pain in the world, and that's not an illusion, right?

[chris-da-fur]

haha I started meditation and self inquiry while in college a couple years ago now and I quickly realized the idea of "learning" all the mostly useless stuff I spent hours working on in order to be thought of as "intelligent" and successful is a total joke. Totally socially constructed. That didn't help my grades much lol. Best to just let that all go and deal with the work load on a moment to moment basis and not think about how retarded it is.

[Midnight]

I've felt the same way as you have MetaCognition, in regards to trying to "become" something, and working extremely hard to get a job that will eventually become a routine and is just used as a means to keep on surviving. Nothing's happening, you're just trying not to die...

That sounds a lot gloomier than I intended, but that's what jobs have become to most people. I volunteer at a hospital, and I see all these amazing men and women help people everyday, yet they seem to take their jobs for granted, waiting for something to happen to take them away from the repetition of everyday life.

It's funny because in hunter-gatherer societies, people spent around 2 hours a day doing things to ensure their survival, and then the rest of the time socializing with each other.

Reading up on those societies has led me to a new mindset when it comes to living life, and participating in this world. People in H-G societies were just living life. I see this time on Earth as one for experiencing everything that I can. Go out and see the world, try different things, etc. I'm led by a genuine curiosity to just experience things these days.

I'm a biochemistry major at my university, and this mindset is wonderful for actually learning the different concepts that are being taught. I love looking at the different theories scientists have postulated about the nature of atoms, and how they work, and how all this information fits together. I have thought before that maybe scientists are trying to make something out of nothing, but regardless of what it really is, I find it the lessons are fascinating, and this attitude propels me academically.

Ultimately, yeah, it might be pointless in the grand scheme of things, but I look at it all as another thing to experience. I find that even though I know I am not my mind, that doesn't stop me from using it the way it had always wanted to be used. It's a great tool for learning things in this world, and that's how I use it.

[MetaCognition]

I've known since high school that it was all a charade, but I used to be ok with this because doing well still allowed positive identity formation in terms of intelligence. I was/am able to do well in school because unlike most who simply memorize symbols and attempt to regurgitate information, I always understood it was just the mind and not inherent truth or validity at work. Now, however, I am not particularly interested in being seen as smart because only in letting go of these associations can I realize my true freedom.

I do think I can and do use my mind for beneficial purposes, as said it's a tool given to us for a reason. The problem is that almost no one else seems to realize this. "The map is not the territory" does not seem to be something that anyone is living by, even if they say they "understand" it. The mind keeps talking to itself, and I have to wonder: at what point is communication just complete nonsense?

I have previously been living under the "reality tunnel" that proposed that evolution of humanity was occurring in a mostly linear fashion, but like everything else in life it appears to be cyclical more than anything else. Knowing this makes it hard to take the western conception of "work" serious since materialism, having its place, is clearly not "the way to live" and in a few generations our entire conception of life will be completely different.

Is the simple answer just to relax and deal with whatever life throws at me, even if it seems to "make no sense?" Even if I can see beyond the illusions? If I start writing about how I do not exist, they will lock me up!!

[Karmoh]

Originally Posted by MetaCognition

Is the simple answer just to relax and deal with whatever life throws at me, even if it seems to "make no sense?" Even if I can see beyond the illusions? If I start writing about how I do not exist, they will lock me up!!

Think of your future as freedom from dualistic extremes. It is freedom from the position that everything exists separately and freedom from the position that nothing exists. Even though you have seen through separation, imagine if you refused to speak of conventional existence. We would be sitting at the dinner table unable to ask Mum to pass the potatoes because the humble potato has no separate existence. When we sit on extreme mental positions, we are living from the memory of an insight rather than the present experience of awareness itself. When we move beyond the extreme viewpoints such as essentialism v’s nihilism, a complete openness to life and its various perspectives arises. We experience a more open, balanced, and holistic lifestyle.



peace

[MetaCognition]

"Before Enlightenment chop wood carry water, after Enlightenment, chop wood carry water."

This would be the statement that helps me the most