Hi Kevin,
Welcome to the Project Meditation forum. Here you will find support and insight from some of the kindest, most knowledgeable, and funny people you've ever met. Just keep your heart open with a sense of curiosity and gratitude for the things that are showing up in your life and for the "forms" in which they may appear. There are so many wonderful books, practices, techniques, etc., that are available to assist us all in awakening and remembering. One of the practices that came into my awareness a number of years ago is "focusing." (In case you might be interested, here is the website:
The Focusing Institute) A poem that kind of sums of the focusing process was written hundred of years ago by the mystic Rumi.)
"The Guest House"
This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they are a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.
The dark thought, the shame, the malice.
meet them at the door laughing and invite them in.
Be grateful for whatever comes.
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.
-- Jelaluddin Rumi (1207-1273)
translation by Coleman Barks
Concerning the anger you are noticing, I suggest that you might try simply welcoming it in to your "guesthouse," your presence. Don't label it as "good" or "bad." Just simply notice it. You might say, with a sense of curiosity, "Oh, so I notice anger. Hmmm. It feels kind of like a red clenching in my stomach. Isn't that interesting. I wonder if this 'guest' might have more of a message for me."
The process I am describing is one of "space" or "presence." Meditation is an excellent means of increasing "space" in our lives. If you are brand new to the meditation process, I suggest that you be gentle with your self, establish a regular time to meditate every day, and don't be harsh on yourself if you miss a day or don't meditate for as long as you "think" you ought to. It is my understanding that it is not uncommon to notice a lot of "stuff" coming up. You are becoming more aware and are noticing what has always been there. We need to notice, to welcome and accept, what is there before we can release it.
One other thought that has been suggested by Michael is The Sedona Method (
Sedona Method (official site) The Secret self-help program; self-improvement technique) for working with some of the "stuff" we may start to notice as we meditate. I have purchased this program, and it is proving really beneficial.
Anyway, these are just some of my thoughts and suggestions. I'll be curious to hear how things continue to unfold for you and to hear of the "gifts" you are receiving that are working for you. Happy journeying. --Keith
